Which Slasher movie villain has the highest (cool) body count? – An overly long analysis of the sex lives of the silent and deadly

Slasher movie villains are often ranked by their body count. You can find numerous AI-generated articles that rank Slasher villains by their number of kills. Popular Youtube channels such as Dead Meat are devoted to counting up how many kills are in horror movies. Basically, an audience exists for these types of listicles which may include you, nerd.

However, this meaning of body count is the same type that school shooters and other full-time virgins acquire. The real body count that matters is how many people they’ve smashed. Sex has often been seen as playing an integral part in Slasher movies. They’re famous for involving topless women (who die) people having sex (who die) and virginal women (who don’t die). This trope of the virgin girl in Slasher movies has been much discussed but they’re not the only virgins involved in Slasher movies, not counting the audience. The iconic killers of the genre are also commonly virgins and this article’s ground-breaking research will show their precise body counts.

Michael Myers – Halloween

Despite arguably being the father of Slasher villains, Michael Myers himself is a virgin. Being trapped in an asylum since you were six years old does limit dating options, as does your therapist telling anyone who interacts with you that you’re evil incarnate. A cockblock that would make even the kindest soul want to murder an entire town. The creator of the Halloween franchise, John Carpenter would illuminate upon Michael Myers’ sex life after some hard-hitting answers from R.A. The Rugged Man, occasional interviewer, full-time white rapper.

R.A. – Is Michael Myers a virgin?

Carpenter – Is he a virgin?

R.A. – I mean, all he does is kill. Did he ever get laid?

Carpenter – I don’t think he was able to. He was fucked up, I think he got confused between fucking and killing.

R.A. – What if he’s really just a repressed homosexual on a rampage?

Carpenter – I never thought about that. I just think he’s crazy. But what do I know, maybe he is.

 While Carpenter has seemingly never thought if his killer was a virgin (or gay), to the series’ creator Myers shouldn’t be able to even consider having sex, or at least how normal people understand sex.  An idea regarding the usage of knives in horror movies that has been discussed by critics like Carol J. Clover is that the knife is essentially a penis. As many murders in horror movies involve the killing of nude or almost nude women the murders can be viewed as the following. The knife represents a subconscious sexual desire for the woman victim that the Slasher is unable to express through his actual penis. This idea fits in with Carpenter saying that Michael ‘gets confused between fucking and killing’. The first scene in the franchise represents this best out of the franchise. Michael as a 6-year-old views his sister making out with her boyfriend and stabs her to death as she is naked. Which does make you see Carpenter’s idea that he was getting sex and murder confused. It also makes you see that Michael maybe has a little bit of incest in him.  

 Of course, a franchise that is based around a man chasing a woman does bring up the question, is he trying to smash? As the first murder shows, Laurie being his sister in the original continuity might not be a deterrent to Michael. Maybe Michael does deep down inside want to get some of his sister’s cheeks. However, while this incestuous interest is all subtextual in most films in the franchise, at the midpoint of the series it was intended for Michael to commit Brazzers.com level incest. Michael was meant to have fathered a child with his kidnapped niece. This plot point was in an early version of the script for the sixth film in the franchise Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers. Which as the incest baby plot implies manages to be the worst movie in a franchise filled with horrible films. It’s also the only one starring Paul Rudd. In the released film, his niece inexplicitly has a child though the father is never actually mentioned. As this plot point was not properly included in the actual film and because niece touching doesn’t count, Michael is still a virgin.

 Michael is essentially the textbook Slasher villain, a blank silent slate that only exists to murder teenagers. As a result, his love life is the same as a typical horror movie villain, non-existent.

Ranking

Horniness – 3/10

Body Count – 0

Leatherface – The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Leatherface stands out as one of Slasher cinema’s few horny villains. A character trait you might’ve been able to guess from him having the same build and outfit choices as a Redditor. Of course, as Slasher movie franchises are constructed with the same care as his masks, Leatherface’s horniness has changed from film to film. In the first film and most others in the franchise, Leatherface is essentially asexual. His interests only are food and his family, like a typical Texan. He and his family even laugh off the final girl Sally’s pleas that she’ll do anything to live in the original film, unlike a typical Texan. However, this is very different in the sequel, where Leatherface develops a crush on the film’s protagonist Stretch. He goes so far as to switch up his trademark chainsaw dancing by putting his chainsaw over his groin and humping with it like he’s daggering. He even saves her life from the rest of his family by pretending he has murdered her. Despite this Leatherface ultimately sides with his family over Stretch when his brother explains that no one in his family even knows what sex is. As a result, thanks to sticking to a Money Over Bitches mentality Leatherface remains a virgin.

 The reason for Leatherface’s horniness is because the Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 switches from the raw, gritty tone of the original to the vibe of a Saturday morning cartoon. As a result, Leatherface is transformed into having the personality of a pubescent boy in a six foot seven three hundred pound body. Which to be fair is the average weight of a Texan teenager. His horniness continues into the third instalment of the franchise, though much more disgustingly. In the film, Leatherface has his own (implied) child thanks to what is (implied) to be either incest or you know something even less chill than incest. The child member of the family is never explicitly said to be Leatherface’s kid and considering the circumstances in which the child would be conceived, this cannot be counted as a W for him. After the third movie, no other films in the franchise have bought up Leatherface’s sexuality. This is despite the second movie being made by the film’s original creators and therefore essentially being the word of God. As every reboot and remake of the franchise strives for the tone of the original, Leatherface returns to his normal murderous self. However, all these films absolutely suck so maybe one day a director will be desperate enough to let Leatherface return to humping his chainsaw.

 Overall, Leatherface shows that ambition may not lead to results. While he is a rare horny Slasher villain Leatherface remains a virgin like his counterparts.

Ranking

Horniness – 0 or 100

Body Count – 0

Jason Voorhees – Friday the 13th

Even though Jason has a staggering twelve (not thirteen) movies, he has barely shown any form of sexuality. This is of course thanks to Jason being an undead child, who then actually wasn’t undead but was an alive man who still had the brain of a child, before being killed, only to be accidentally resurrected as a zombie. As a result, women are not high on his list of interests. The only things Jason is known to like are murder, his mother and hanging out around the lake. Jason’s lack of interest in sex is especially ironic considering his origin. He was a victim of other people having sex as he died (but actually didn’t) as a child due to camp consolers being too busy fucking to save him from drowning. Dying (but not really) from other people having sex is particularly embarrassing for a person who has literally never even talked to a woman.

 As a result of dying from other people fucking, somewhat of a fan-created lore is that Jason deliberately targets those who have sex. Which would make him horny as we all know being anti-sex is the biggest sign of someone being a pervert. However, Jason has killed numerous people who have clearly never had sex, with his trademark Hockey mask coming from a fat virgin. Of course, the real reason why Jason kills so many victims who have sex is due to producers trying to draw in those interested in murder AND tits. Two key demographics to have for any successful franchise.

 There is, however, one film in the franchise where Jason displays what can be read as noncery. In Friday the 13th Part 3 main character Chris, a rare woman Chris, reveals that years ago she was attacked by Jason with her passing out so she can’t remember the exact details of what happened. As the flashbacks just shows Jason grabbing Chris and dragging her away like a caveman combined with how Chris somehow isn’t dead maybe Jason’s MO was a little different than normal. Chris was originally meant to be flat-out molested by Jason before the screenwriters decided that it was too far for a film that includes someone’s head being crushed by Jason’s bare hands. Of course, this doesn’t count towards Jason’s body count and not towards his overall horniness rating. His horniness rating is not affected because Friday the 13th is even by horror movie franchise standards a particularly slap-dash series, especially in the first films in the franchise. Jason just a film before had been changed from a dead child to a serial killer and his trademark hockey mask would only be introduced halfway through the third film. Jason’s character had barely been thought out, although let’s be honest not a lot of thinking was needed, with the series switching from screenwriters and directors film to film at its start. The Jason popular with audiences is the undead and most importantly for this article, asexual version from the 6th movie on.

 Overall, Jason is the least sexual of any Slasher movie villains, displaying no interest aside from murder. This is a reason for Jason’s popularity being a ‘wholesome’ killer whose films you can pop on and see nice gorey murder without any of the gross molesty stuff.

Ranking

Horniness – 0/10

Body Count – 0

Various Ghostfaces – Scream

Scream as a franchise famously flips Slasher tropes. One of them is not having the invulnerable constantly masked-up killers of other Slasher franchises. The killers are shown as normal people before the reveal of them being serial killers, as the stories function as very violent whodunnits. As a result, not only have there been various Ghostfaces, nearly all of them have had sex. Interestingly the person they have sex with is commonly the protagonist of the film. This is the case in the original Scream, the recent 2022 movie (oops spoilers) and in the forgotten TV series. The common in movie reason for this is some form of scheme that involves the current Ghostface trying to get close to the lead character. For example in the first film, Billy Loomis has sex with series lead protagonist Sidney Prescott as part of his greater scheme to get revenge against her. As Scream is meta in referring to horror cliches, the second reason is to subvert the trope that only virgin women survive Slasher movies. This inadvertently creates a new trope, that Slashers who have sex don’t survive movies.

 Ghostfaces stand out as an outlier on the overall results, and this is because they’re not true Slasher villains. A key part of the Slasher genre that differentiates it from others like Giallos is having a distinctive killer. But true Slasher killers are not just unique because of their look, it’s because there is no mystery to who they are. They are also far more cartoonish than the Ghostfaces of Scream. A character like Jason or Michael Myers is unable to attend high school and have a girlfriend like the Ghostfaces. Essentially, as the Ghostfaces have had sex before their identity as the killer is even known to the audience they don’t really count.

Ranking

Horniness – Plotting 

Body Count – Normally at least 1

Chucky – Child’s Play

 While being a doll might make you think Chucky’s love life is limited, he’s actually the only Slasher villain to be married and have a sex scene. Before the fourth film in the franchise Bride of Chucky, the tiny murderer showed no real signs of horniness. Well aside from his catchphrase ‘I’m Chucky wanna play’ which is a guy named Charles specific pickup line. Voice actor Brad Dourif also gives Chucky the same voice as your uncle who flirts with bartenders. However, Bride of Chucky sees him reunited with his former girlfriend Tiffany, who Chucky went out with before his voodoo transformation into a doll. This confirms Chucky as having been with a woman during his time as a human, a rare act for a Slasher villain. Chucky kills Tiffany to turn her into a doll too, and they continue their healthy relationship together. After being inspired by watching two victims have sex, the two dolls make cinematic history by engaging in the first Slasher villain on Slasher villain sex scene and the first doll on doll sex scene. This horrible attempt at comedy, just slightly less embarrassing than this article’s attempts, leads to Chucky having a child in the follow-up film Seed of Chucky. Having two movies devoted to his family life makes Chucky the only Slasher villain whose sex life plays an important role.

 It’s necessary to note that Chucky’s love life taking centre stage in his films happened when the series turned to pure deliberate farce. Bride of Chucky was released in 1998 in the boom of self-aware horror movies that arrived in the aftermath of Scream. While Chucky was never the most serious of characters with him being a wise-cracking doll, he still only had sex when his series started to include things like killing Britney Spears impersonators. Or when rapper Redman of How High fame appeared as himself in Seed Of Chucky. Or when part of the marketing campaign for Bride Of Chucky included having Chucky appear in wrestling organisation WCW to begin a feud with wrestler Rick Steiner. Who isn’t even the famous Steiner brother. Nothing shows appealing to the lowest common denominator more than trying to market your film to wrestling fans. This is best shown by WCW going out of business a few years later thanks to advertisers literally refusing to have their products associated with wrestling. Overall, this shows that if a horror villain is gonna have sex in their film, that movie will be stupid as hell.

 Overall, despite being a doll with the soul of a serial killer, Chucky has the most traditional love life of any Slasher villain. Being married with a child and having this become an integral part of the character’s identity makes Chucky the character any horror fan should aspire to be. As he also fucks dolls which horror fans also do.  

Ranking

Horniness – Married

Body Count – 2 (Tiffany in human and doll form)

Freddy Krueger – A Nightmare on Elm Street

 Freddy Krueger is one of Slasher cinema’s most talkative villains and as a result, it would make you think he had enough time to say some freaky shit. Throughout the franchise, Freddy does several horny actions, which are best shown in the first film. Krueger repeatedly harrases a group of teenagers throughout the film with him attacking the lead character Nancy on several occasions. Freddy gives Nancy the most uncomfortable phone call of her life, an impressive feat considering her boyfriend was played by Johnny Depp, when Freddy tells her that he is ‘her boyfriend now’ and licks her through the phone. Aside from this Souja Boy inspired harassment in another scene, when Nancy falls asleep in the bath Freddy’s trademark razor blade-covered hand rises out of the water directly in-between her legs. On the bright side, this would be a quick way to get rid of that classic 80s muff.

 Freddy out of all other iconic Slasher movie villains has had the most, let’s call it ‘implication’, of doing more than just murdering his victim. Aside from Freddy’s aforementioned horny actions, the murders in the film can be seen as being reminiscent of sexual violence. The first murder in the franchise sees a young woman attacked in her bed by an invisible assailant while screaming for help. Freddy kills her by cutting her open directly in between her breasts ripping through both her shirt and skin. The sexual nature of Freddy’s crimes was originally meant to be overt. Series creator Wes Craven, the originator of sex crimes in horror movies envisioned Freddy as being a child molester, not a child killer. This was changed as killing children was believed to be more acceptable to audiences than abusing them. The belief that having a child molester in your horror movie would leave a bad taste in the audience’s mouth was proven correct with the horrible 2010 remake, where Freddy is a full-on toucher. Of course, these do not count towards his body count and sadly puts Freddy’s horniness in the same section as BBC Radio DJs. Criminal.

 Freddy however, can have sex that isn’t highly illegal. At least he was before being burned into a prune. It’s revealed in the sixth film in the franchise Freddy’s Dead: The Final Nightmare that he had been married. He even had a child proving that he is capable of having regular sex, giving him one confirmed body at least. It also makes Freddy one of the few Slasher villains to have had a wife or kid. Though the achievement is a bit less impressive as he killed his wife and tried to kill his kid.

 Overall, Freddy is one of the few Slasher icons whose horror is sexual in nature. He performs some actions which would get him sent to HR for sexual harassment. He also is rare as his backstory involves him being married and having a child.

Ranking

Horniness – Nonce

Body Count – 1

Pinhead – Hellraiser

Despite Hellraiser not truly being a Slasher franchise, it would be wrong not to include horror’s most horny monster, Pinhead. The head of a group of extra-dimensional BDSM enthusiasts called the Cenobites, who Pinhead describes as ‘explorers in the further regions of experience. Demons to some. Angels to others’. A statement you’ll also find in a poly couple’s Tinder bio. As a result, the Cenobites’ intentions are sexual, well the type of sexuality that 40-year-old divorced women have. Pinhead and his Cenobites tight black leather get-ups are clearly based on S&M fetish gear and their bodies show signs of self-mutilation for sexual pleasure. Pinhead’s trademark look was originally envisioned to include pins going down his entire torso, which was meant to imply he had a Prince Albert.

 Pinhead of course has never been shown to have actual sex in the film series. But Pinhead has in fact nutted so much that he has reached a higher point of existence. This is how Cenobites even exist. They’re the end result of humans who seek and solve a puzzle box that supposedly allows them to reach a world of unnatural pleasure. So, for Pinhead to even seek out the puzzle box in his human form he must’ve been doing some nasty shit. In the second movie Pinhead is shown to have originally been an Officer in the British Army during WW1 before his goth glow-up. As a result, many would suspect that perhaps he was a tragic figure, someone simply trying to escape the horror of war. However, those with historical knowledge know that English officers during WW1 were famous for their interest in buggery and other boarding school-inspired perversions.

 This extremely sexual horror makes sense when you consider the series creator Clive Barker. Barker is a horror Renaissance man, an author, director, screenwriter and on top of that a weird pervert. Barker’s other creations include Rawhead Rex a giant penis-shaped demon who attacks an Irish town, based on a creature from Irish folklore called the English. As shown Barker is not afraid of making the horror of his stories based in sex, with the story of Hellraiser itself focusing on a woman’s affair with a pile of meat. With this shortened explanation of the film’s story being a legitimate explanation of the film’s plot. The horror of the Cenobites comes from fear of sexual deviancy. Them being from another world is a representation of how extreme sexual fetishes can be incomprehensible to those outside of the subcultures they exist in. Pinhead, therefore, is a horror villain that is sexual at his very core.

 Pinhead is the ultimate gorilla pimp of horror movie villains. Whilst his counterparts are successful if they have had sex once, Pinhead has literally fucked so much that he’s supernatural.

Ranking

Horniness – Instagram model DM’er

Body Count – ∞

Conclusion

 The Slasher villain with the highest body count depends on how you measure it. Pinhead due to his mere existence has to have the largest body count. However, he is never shown to actually have sex and there’s no idea what number his body count really is. In this regard, Chucky boasts the highest body count of the genre. Being the only Slasher villain to have a sex scene as well as having a wife and kid who are essential to his character, Chucky is Slasher cinema’s best lover. Even despite being the biggest cocksmith in Slasher movie history, his body count is only one or two, depending on if you count becoming a doll as making you count for two different people.

 While we now know which Slasher icon has had the most sex, many more questions about Slashers have been raised. When looking at the results of the research, the majority of Slasher movie villains are virgins. In this manner, they are actually quite accurate to real mass murderers, despite them also having supernatural powers. The reason for Slasher villains being virgins on the surface is very simple. Imaging a silent masked assailant laying pipe removes a bit of the horror from its villain. As a result, Slasher movie villains with any sexual interests are nearly always in films with comedic elements, with Scream, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Child’s Play franchises all showing this trend. Of course, these comedic Slasher villains include sex because sex is about as low-brow as humour can get. The easiest way for a cheap laugh is by having some kind of sexual mishap or innuendo. Bride of Chucky and Seed of Chucky both go for that late 90s early 2000s self-aware, pop culture spoofing humour found in works like South Park or the Scary Movie franchise. Bride of Chucky even shares the same gag as Team America : World Police as both films have two dolls fuck. Of course, the big difference is Team America was funny. Texas Chain Saw Massacre 2, on the other hand, goes for a level of humour too embarrassing for a primary school panto, by having Leatherface start air-humping with his chainsaw. As a result, having your Slasher villain have sex or be horny is a big sign that the screenwriter is a hack.

Hellraiser and to a lesser extent Nightmare on Elm Street show that if a horror villain is to remain serious whilst including a sexual element, it must be an integral part of their horror. Nightmare on Elm Street being about a killer targeting victims in a helpless state does bring up a similarity to sexual abuse as does their parents covering up crimes against children. Hellraiser’s Pinhead and his Cenobites show a horror that is based on fear of sexual deviancy and excess. Sexuality is the basis of Hellraiser’s narrative, with Pinhead and the Cenobites not even the main antagonists of the film, with the story being about a violent love affair between a married woman and her zombified brother-in-law. As a result, including sex in a work of horror and for it to be taken seriously requires sexuality to be baked into the very core of the horror itself.

 Another interesting development is that Slasher villains are often envisioned to be sexually violent in earlier versions of scripts, which is ultimately missing in the final product. Halloween, Friday the 13th, Nightmare on Elm Street and Texas Chainsaw Massacre arguably the most iconic franchises in the genre’s history all have had early drafts of scripts that make their villains into flat-out rapists. All of these elements have been removed from the final product due to them being seen as going too far. Of course, this is interesting for how the genre’s is viewed by both filmmakers and audiences. The genre is defined by deliberately striving to have the violence be as over the top and gorey as possible. However, sexual violence is a step too far. This likely has to do with what these films aim for. Whilst of course they intend to be scary, Slashers do include a certain amount of light-heartedness at their core. The murders nor the murderers aren’t realistic and you can’t extend the same creativity of violence the genre is famous for with sexual violence. 

 In recent years Slasher movies have been seeing somewhat of a return in popularity. The success of films such as the recent Scream instalment and a new series in A24’s X, which saw two instalments being released in 2022 alone. These films often see a flip on trends regarding sex and gender in Slasher movies. For example, X is an extremely sexual Slasher film with it essentially being what if the hippies from Texas Chain Saw Massacre were pornstars. While these new Slasher movies often try to flip old cliches of the genre regarding gender, like the ideas of their being a virginal final girl or promiscuous women dying. As a result, the final girl being a virgin trope is dead. However, their opposition remain virgins. So when will the final revision of the genre take place? Will there ever be a horror movie brave enough to subvert the true gender cliché of the genre? When will an auteur come around and show a classical masked Slasher villain fucking in a completely serious manner?

PS. And yes after getting to this part of the article I remembered that Jennifer’s Body and It Follows exist. But I’m not counting demons I mean masked silent killers like the genre is known for. Also yes I wrote about X and the villain in that is horny as hell but Bad Grandpa-style old lady makeup doesn’t count as a mask Mia Goth.